Learning To Trust in God
Trusting in God
Perhaps one of the most challenging things that we can learn to do is to place our complete trust in God. This used to be tough for me, not because I lacked the belief that God is able to do things in my life, but because I often fell into the trap of thinking I could control my life. However, this is a lie that is often whispered to us and we must be aware of it. In order to trust God more, we have to spend time with Him. For me, this is in the Eucharistic Adoration.
I would often say prayers because my mother had taught them to me. But all I would do is just say the words of the prayers. I was not really there, because my mind was more focused on the other things that I had to do after I finished saying my prayers. One of the things I “had” to do after my prayers, was to check social media. I used to spend so much time trying to keep up with the world through social media. That took away my study time. Then I would complain because I had so much studying to do in so little time. I did not spend time with God and so, as an effect, I found it hard to trust Him.
Finding Distraction Rather Than Fullness of Life
One day, while on a retreat, I learned that I wasn’t using my time wisely. And it made me notice how empty I felt inside. I was wasting time trying to keep up with the imaginary world of social media, which cannot compare with the trueness and fulfillment of spending time with God.
I learned that prayer is a conversation with God. It is also a time in which He calls us to be with Him. This means to actually be with Him and not somewhere else, trying to fix our problems by worrying, or being in our imaginary worlds. Think of this as a baby whose little face is covered with food from eating his meal. His mother tries to clean his face, but he moves so much that he gives his mother trouble cleaning him. When we try to take control of our lives and do not trust God, this is what we are doing. He knows what we need and when.
Learning to Pray
With this realization, I began to seek to learn ways to pray. Prayer is conversation between us and God. It includes us speaking and asking for things, but it also means being quiet and listening to God. I began by praying in the silence of my room, with my phone on silent and the Holy Bible in front of me. This was fruitful and it lead me to seek for more, which I found during Adoration of the Eucharist.
Here, God is truly present before us and in the silence of our hearts, we can learn how to trust Him more. I saw that if He, who is all powerful, loves us so much to be present before us as what looks like a tiny host of bread, then, He loves us so much that He will take care of our future. It is here, where I learned that He wants us not to worry but to place our trust in Him.